Chicken Season

Customer: I’d like a pound and a half of salmon.

Me: Sure thing! Would you like the farm raised or the wild caught?

Customer: Oh god, the wild salmon. Never farm raised. That’s disgusting and wrong.

Me: Anything else?

Customer: Yes. Two pounds of boneless chicken breast.

(I start to fill a tray with the chicken. She stops me.)

Customer: Wait, young man. This is fresh, yes?

Me: Yes, ma’am. It’s fresh, never frozen.

Customer: And its wild caught, hmmmm?

Me:, ma’am. Its farm raised. All chicken is farm raised.

Customer: That can’t be! Why the hell would that be true?!

Me: I mean, no one is going out chickens.

Customer: Maybe not here!

(She walks away)