Butterball Suicide Hotline

Customer: Do you have any more Bell & Evans turkeys?

Me: I’m sorry, ma’am. We only got a few of them in.

Customer: I saw them the other day, but I figured you would get more.

Me: I’m sorry. I do have plenty of butterball and our brand of turkeys left.

Customer: I’m having people over. I’d kill myself if I had to serve...Butterball.